what is your motivation to recover?
To be honest at this stage I don't have proper motivation to recover fully from it as it is the only thing I know that helps me have some control and relief.
However I do have slight motivation to recover such as in the summer which it is sort of now in the UK. I want to be able to wear short sleeved t-shirts and not have people looking at my cuts and scars as this terrifies me to death or giving me dirty looks as they don't know my past but they think they have the right to judge me.
In the long run when I start to think about having a family of my own I don't want my children to look at my cuts and scars and have the impression it is okay for them to do it. I don't want them to feel the emotional pain I feel on a regular basis that they have to convert it in to physical pain.
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